“David fastened on his sword over the tunic and tried walking around, because he was not used to them. ‘I cannot go in these,’ he said to Saul, ‘because I am not used to them.’ So he took them off.” — 1 Samuel 17:39

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When I was 15, I didn’t make my high school baseball team. I had trained all offseason and even went to a three-day hitting clinic where several major leaguers from the local area were some of the coaches. I thought I had performed well enough during the tryout to at least make the roster.

But when the coaches posted the list of names, mine wasn’t there. I scanned the list again, hoping I had somehow skipped past my own name out of excitement. But reality set in. My mind scrambled to make sense of the situation as I balanced a mixture of shock, sadness and embarrassment.

That rejection hit particularly hard because I had started building my identity around being a baseball player. Suddenly, I felt left out and unsure of who I was.

My good friend David had made the team, and later that spring while at his house, I found his baseball jersey in his closet and tried it on. I wanted so badly to feel like I was on the team that I thought wearing his jersey would give me that feeling.

But there was no way to escape the cruel reality the mirror was spitting back at me — David’s jersey didn’t fit me. He was much taller, so the tail of the shirt almost reached my knees, and the sleeves covered up most of my arms. I would’ve had to wear several layers so it wouldn’t hang so loosely off my body. Instead of making me feel like part of the team, all it did was remind me of what I didn’t have.

This makes a lot more sense to me years later. That jersey didn’t fit because it was never intended for me. I didn’t earn it. It didn’t feel the way I wanted it to because it wasn’t supposed to. It simply wasn’t my jersey.

This is what comparison does to us. I was so focused on fitting into David’s jersey that I missed out on all the metaphorical outfits in my own closet that I actually fit into. The ones that were intended for me, that were my size. I was seeking joy and belonging from something I was never intended to belong to. God had different plans for me, I just wasn’t in a place where I wanted to embrace them yet.

Another David understood this before facing Goliath. Before the battle, King Saul dressed David in armor: a bronze helmet, chainmail and a sword. It was the gear of kings and warriors, but David couldn’t move in it (see verse above).

Instead, he walked into battle carrying what God had already equipped him with: stones, a sling and confidence in the Lord. David refused to fight dressed as someone else.

How often do we do the opposite? We wear borrowed armor — chasing approval, success, influence or someone else’s definition of significance. We convince ourselves that our gifts aren’t enough, our story isn’t enough, or our calling isn’t enough.

But God never asked you to wear someone else’s jersey.

The battle in front of you doesn’t require borrowed armor. It requires faithfulness with what God has already given you. Comparison says, “You need what they have.” God says, “I’ve already equipped you.”

So rather than questioning whether your stones look as impressive as someone else’s sword, reorient your heart to trust the God who placed the stones in your hand in the first place.

— Cole Claybourn

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