“And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.” — John 8:32 (NKJV)

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You hear a lot about sports nutrition these days. I wish as a young person I would have had a better understanding of nutrition. I’ve yet to see butter biscuits and sweet tea on any high-profile athlete’s breakfast-of-champions list, but I’m not going to lie — it is a favorite of mine occasionally. I can’t help but think of some good advice my dad gave me recently: A lot of life is about balance. While we weren’t talking about nutrition, it applies to so many areas of life.

I understand all too well what it looks like to get out of balance when it comes to fitness. As a young person, there were times when my fitness routine involved changing the channel on the remote. As I entered high school, I became more aware of social norms and what culture valued from an appearance perspective. I started eating what I thought was better and working out more. The weight started to come off and the compliments started to come in.

It was the beginning of one of the most dangerous periods of my life because things quickly went from one extreme to the other. I would spend the next decade (DECADE!) of my life battling eating disorders. I was afraid that somehow the weight would come back, irrationally afraid, and rigid control seemed like the only way.

I relate to what Paul talks about in Romans 7:15-20, not doing what he wanted to do and choosing instead the things he hated. Sin is like that. You think you have the freedom to make choices, and the next thing you know, you realize you are not in control at all. I hated having an eating disorder.

As I look back now, I wonder what I could have accomplished had I fueled my body instead of starving it. John 10:10 tells us the “thief comes only to kill, steal and destroy,” and I don’t think we realize the many subtle ways that can happen. Ask anyone who has ever battled an addiction, even an addiction to fitness, and I think they can probably relate.

For years, I kept my eating disorder issues a secret. I tried to get well on my own. I cried. I prayed. I pleaded with God, but still I struggled. Breakthrough came, I believe, when I finally shared the truth with my husband. I think it was the beauty of 1 John 1:9 (NKJV) in action: “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”

Confession and the faithfulness of God ushered in the healing that I so desperately needed. It was hard and painful, but worth it. It was a long time before I could share my story without shame, but I believe Romans 8:28 applies even to our failures. God has a heart to restore what is broken. He certainly did that in my story. He used it to humble me. He used it to help me be more compassionate toward those struggling with addiction, even if their chains looked different from mine.

Even as I was writing this, I saw something I don’t think I ever thought about before: how the serpent tempted Eve with fruit from the forbidden tree in the garden, and how he tempted Jesus in the wilderness with bread. Eve fell for the lie, but not Jesus. That is something that amazes me about Jesus. He had the best of Heaven, but chose to come to this fallen, broken world to become our great High Priest who knew what it was like to be tempted, even with food.

Where we would fail, even in the garden, He reigns victorious, even in the wilderness. In that, He offers us a crucial truth for all of life: Yes, fueling our bodies is important, but even more important is that we fuel our minds with the truth of God’s Word. Because as much as I like fitness, I like being free even more.

Jesus Himself used this truth in Matthew 4:4 (NKJV): “Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God.”

— Rachel Gibbons

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